Torn

We have the SD until the 26th or 27th, not too sure as BM is constantly switching things up. Anyhow, I had made plans for us to do things every weekend so we wouldn't be spending them at home the entire time. Well, last week SD's SG called and wanted her to spend Friday night with her. I had already made plans for Friday, we went to her school's Reading night, they had Santa there and cookies and cider. All the kids got a free book. But I think SD is getting too big or "grown up" for that type of stuff. Saturday, I had went to go and take my CBEST and she hung out with her Dad. When I got home we went to the art musuem for Family Day and did some art projects and checked out the exhibits. After that, we went to the park and played disc golf for a little while. It was super cold and super windy by the time we got out there. We went home for a short time and then went to visit my friends newly purchased home. We did not get home until a little after midnight. Sunday we just relaxed, but we needed it.
This coming weekend I want to take a drive through X-mas tree lane in our town. But SD grandma wants her. And next weekend, I signed us up to help at the local food bank putting care packages together for X-mas and my nephews birthday party. And her grandma (mom's mom) wants her that weekend. They live about 2 hours away and I really do not feel like driving up there, nor can I because my car is not running too well. I hate to tell these people no, I'm not the mom, but if I let the BF do it, he is going to be mean about it. Here I am again trying to keep the peace. I hate being stuck in the middle. I am torn because I know the SD will have fun with her Grandma & SG but she will also get to spend time with Dad. What do I do? I hope I can make the right decision. I hate the holidays for this simple fact, who gets the child. It's not spelled out in the court order and we are currently not following the court order as SD is currently living with us. Can't wait for all of this to be over.